If you have a high level of respect for yourself, you are automatically going to command that respect from a man. Don’t settle for less because you think you are lonely. Marriage is only as good as your singleness. If you don’t love yourself and enjoy your own company, and you are married, thinking your spouse will make you feel fulfilled, unfortunately, you are setting yourself up for a big disappointment. Marriage does not improve you, it rather exposes your weakness. Marriage is as good as your singleness. You love yourself first and then you can share that love with your spouse and loved ones. Always remember, you cannot give what you don’t have. Work on yourself before you say “I DO”.

Many think that Jacob loved Racheal because she was beautiful, beauty only attracts a man to a woman, but what determines his true love for the woman goes beyond beauty. Racheal was not only beautiful, but she was also industrious by excellence. Why do we have lots of beautiful ladies today yet no husband?. It’s because beauty without value is smoke. What impressed and attracted Jacob to Racheal was her industriousness. While her brothers and elder sister Leah, were at home, Racheal singlehandedly brought her Father’s flock to the well. That was where Jacob met her for the first time. No sensible man can resist a woman who is beautiful and industrious. Maximize your singleness. Singleness is not a disease.

What made a man worked for seven years for the woman he loved and yet felt like he just worked for seven days, Value!. My man doesn’t respect me, it’s because you are not a value-added woman (VAW). Do you realize that Jacob did not pay Leah’s bride prize, they gave him Leah as a bonus because she had no value. This was why Jacob had no value for her and her children, hence he set them as the first entourage when he was going to meet Esau, his angry brother. If you forced yourself on a man, he will never respect you. If you are not adding value to him, he will never respect you. Even after marriage, Leah was begging and buying the attention of her own husband, Racheal was practically in control of Jacob. Don’t look to love others, love yourself first. Don’t enter into marriage with baggage that you are expecting your partner to carry.

Racheal was a shepherd in the midst of her siblings, a profession meant for men. She was in control of her Father’s business. This was what glued Jacob to her. After Jacob slept with Leah, he still went for Racheal. Sex doesn’t keep a man, Value does. Leah had 5 children, Racheal had none, yet Jacob still loved Racheal than Leah. Having children is good but adding value is better. Don’t ever think you can pin a man down with children. If you like, give him a nation, if you are not adding value to him, he will walk away someday. Don’t be a liability to a man. Be a shepherd before your Jacob arrives.  Be a value-added woman and your man will respect you. Singleness is not a disease. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Don’t marry because of SEX,

Don’t marry because you are getting OLD,

Don’t marry because you are of AGE,

Don’t marry because you are LONELY,

Don’t marry because you need someone to support you FINANCIALLY,

Don’t mary because you got PREGNANT for him,

Don’t marry because you don’t want to LOSE the PERSON,

Don’t marry because of family PRESSURE,

Don’t marry because you like the IDEA of marriage,

Don’t marry because of PITY or out of PITY,

Don’t marry because of TRIBE,

Don’t marry because you admired wedding GOWN you see,

Don’t marry because you love KIDS,

Don’t marry because all your friends are getting married,

Don’t marry because of physical/academic qualifications,


Marry because you want to fulfill DESTINY and for the right motives.